I empathize more than you know – it takes me hours to research and write these articles, but I maintain a hope that some of my words will encourage someone – or enlighten…it is critical to have others to talk to who understand the diabolical nature of this disease. At least with cancer people rally in support – with Lyme there is so much mis-information, and conventional doctors are downright hostile!

You will get your mental agility back, but it will be slow. Keep the faith.

Blessings,

Jenna

But when it finally got deeply imbedded in my brain, the change in me seemed to happen overnight. I developed a very pronounced tremor in my right hand. I started stuttering and stammering. I lost so many mental abilities that people take for granted. I lost much of my vision and I had a two year eye/headache that felt like a searing hot poker going through my right eye. I thought I’d never get rid of that pain. It took a couple of doctors but I finally got it diagnosed and treated with Topamax. Wow, what a miracle to be able to hold my head up again. I swear I had my right eye packed in ice for two years. Both my eyes bulge from Graves Disease, my right eye bulges more. Because of the bulging I have extremely dry eyes. I have to place 5 drops or ointments in my eyes daily. That also adds to my blurriness, but it’s necessary to do so.

Someday’s I miss my old brain. When I remember how smart I was and all I could do. Now I can’t even complete a simple task. I am just a shell of the woman I used to be. What a waste. I wonder what my life would have been like if I was treated sooner. Would I still be reading for pleasure? I can’t even read children’s books. This is a pretty sad existance. Now….for this blog, I will read, and re-read this about l0 times, checking and re-checking my spelling and punctuation before I send it. In the past, I’d just let it go and trust my flying fingers and wit. Not anymore. I am just pretty much and idiot. An idiot who is in chronic and deep pain 24/7. It sucks.